Sheesh. I have no clue why I'm starting this, but I hope I can let some feelings come out.
I'm a coward, just like most teenagers. Ai. I can't believe I'm scared to friends read this, but I am completely willing to let random strangers read anything I write (shakes head). It makes no sense to an outsider, someone who never experienced the feeling, but I have my reason for being able to do this. When I write, I know strangers will forget this, probably never even think about my problem. Why should they? My life will never get in their way. It will never hinder them on a long running project for a company (assuming a co-worker in a business), it won't scare away customers from a store (assuming a employee in a store), and it certainly won't make their Sunday afternoons friendless (like my depressing best friend a week ago). In fact, their input, if they write one, would help me in ways I never thought of, all without a price tag. That is more than I can ever expect from friends. They can judge and spread rumors, even when they don't mean to and promise not to. In a worse case scenario, very bad rumors would spread, and I'm deathly afraid of rumors. Having a friend spreading rumors will always be a pain to the heart, and it is sure to be a situation that will only cause people to hate each other. It's not like helping me is going to help them in any form. Weighing the benefits of either side and the likely outcomes of speaking, strangers are much easier to deal with. If anything goes wrong, unplug the computer and hope that you didn't just get a stalker (quiet chuckle).
Well... That's my first entry. Did I mention my English is terrible? or that I'm weird? or that I like to rant? Yay for spell check.
